Ladies...You Need A Wife
As women, there are times in our life when only another woman can truly understand our plight. I’ve been married and divorced twice (that’s another topic, for a much longer segment). And now, in my forever, happily ever after marriage, I’ve grown to know me, as well, I totally understand my husband cannot and is not supposed to be my end-all-be-all happiness. However, he absolutely should, and does add to my happiness! Yet, there are times it seems he just doesn’t understand my “womanhood.” How could he, he’s not a woman…no more than I can understand in totality what it means to be a man – and for that, I’m forever grateful he is the man-model for our sons.
It comes as no surprise, my very dear sister-friend and I were on the phone talking about our marriages, and I was sharing how important it is to manage our own expectations, blah, blah, blah… We were both going down a laundry list of things we do as women to support our families, take care of our husband, tend to the house, hold down a career, and the list goes on. While we both agreed these were things we dreamed of and looked forward to, in that moment of fierce agreement and compatibility, she says, “Girl, we need a wife”! We laughed until we cried realizing how wonderful women are – the forces we must be to do it all and still look fly!
Soon after the tears dried, we committed to one another to be the “wife” we never had – simply meaning a committed sister-friend to celebrate our successes, understand our crazy family-lives, someone to lean on when we feel misunderstand, teller of difficult truth, and shopping buddy even when funds are low…nothing like a Dollar Tree run to save the day! Someone who understands the struggle is so real, yet so worth it. The one who will talk you off a ledge because you’ve invested too much of you to give up now! Someone so satisfied with their own craziness, there’s no time to envy or covet yours.
As a woman, we put so much energy into everyone else’s life; we’re often depleted by the end of the day, left with nothing to give to ourselves. We rarely ask for what we want until we’re in an emotional frenzy and nothing makes sense because of our irrational state of being. I’m blessed to have a wonderful husband who shares the load – and still there are those things that require a woman’s unique strength to be gentle, yet powerful. Open without compromise to her standard. We’re able to listen with our ears and our hearts -- available, but not without a worthy cause. We’re simply complex! Many won’t get it, but when you find a true sister-friend who does, make her your “wife”…we all need one!